can't sleep

I started my first semester at Ursuline, I was excited about the higher education that I was about to receive. I had my first real english class, this was the first one I had taken in a long time. I stepped into class needing a refresher on many things that I had learned along time ago in school, but over the years had forgotten. My instructor was very enthusiastic and quite helpful. I thought this was wonderful, l I was finally going to learn to write, now I can write my children's books. If anyone could assist me in achieving my life goal, I knew that This professors would.

For a young man I found him very knowledgeable about many things, he knew his subject well. As an older woman, I was even proud of him for all of his accomplishments that I perceived that he had achieved, I said to myself "this young man is phenomenal."

The reading was a bit much but I kept up. The last book that we were instructed to read changed my view about some things. I was shocked,hurt,and even angered, about the choice of reading that was considered academic. I thought "how has education fallen so low, is this what I was in a hurry to get back to?" A christain school with loose or no morals, surley we have thrown the baby out with the bath water.

I tried to look over the pornography and cursing, as a few conformers had suggested. but I found myself constantly thinking and being convicted about It, I felt like a compromiser. MY 76 year old God fearing mother asked me about my class, and what I was learning from the material, my sister motioned for me not to tell her, I had to change the subject. I dared not tell the girls that I mentor from Central State about what their dear sis Brown was reading. Some of the ladies stopped reading the "Zane" books because of our discussion of the negative affects these books had on them. These girls expressed a desire to change, not only were they sexually promiscuous but, many said they started at an early age and didn't know how to stop. Although these are college students they are working on trying to change their "ghetto" lifestyles.

I know that this may not seem normal to some people because often times people accept many things without question, but I assure you that it is very sane. When you have been taught to reject the bad and accept the good, and stand for something or fall for anything, it is difficult to switch the roles, even when your grade depends on it. What people read in their leisure is none of my business, but no one else should be subjected to others preferences without permission. One of the men at the church who is a recovering drug addict use to always tell me, you don't make monkeys sell peanuts. I now understand what he meant. You shouldn't force an alcoholic to work in a liquor store, and you cannot fix the societal problems by adding to them.

In my own personal life I found myself headed down the wrong path. I purposely chose to remove certain things from my sight/life in order to change the direction of my downward spiral. I am now on my way up and I will not be stifled stopped or weighed down.

Sucess happens one step at a time

When I first came to this class I met with a great deal of frustration. I did not know how to blog and neither did I think it a useful or nesscessary tool for my future endevors. I have since overcome my fear of blogging. Although I want to write children's books, I didnt want anyone to read my writing because I knew that it would have lots of gramatical errors. I thought that these people in the class have been in school for a while, or have come fresh from school, they knew how a writing paper needed to look,, and mines was not it. I have seen myself progress in the writing process. I know it will only get better from here. To the ladies who shared a group project with me,thank you we worked well together. Harmony makes a big difference in productivity. Look to see my books and drawings in a store near you. Just look for "The Princess of Briggadeedoo."

Just an observation

I sat down to watch the Transformers movie with my daughters this past Thanksgiving. While I watched I saw the scene where the miniture Decepticon found satisfaction in humping the leg and of the beautiful young lady star of the show. While humping he made sexual small talk. I guess the producers thought that this was funny. I thought about all the kids who watched the movie. I thougth about how just two weeks ago I had to intercede for a young girl on the corner of my street. As they waited for the bus to arrive, one boy had her from the front and another rolled up on her from the back. I told her that she was too valueble to allow someone to degrade her in that manner. I remembered the students that were suspended for sexual harrasment, and the ones who get in trouble for humping things and experimenting in the bathrooms. I wonder if the man who killed those eleven women would have related to that part of the movie,after all perversion does not just all of a sudden happen. I want to know who are the decepticons, the robots or the producers?